Thanksgiving and Wall Street: Because Even the Market Needs a Nap, Apparently

Alright, let's cut the corporate fluff. You wanna know if the stock market's open for Thanksgiving and Black Friday? Is the stock market open on Thanksgiving and Black Friday? What to know Yeah, it's closed. Mostly. And then it's open for a ridiculously short time. Big shocker, right? Wall Street, the epitome of the relentless grind, suddenly decides it needs a breather. Give me a break.

The Grand Pause, Or, How Wall Street "Suffers" Through a Long Weekend

So, here's the deal for 2025, straight from the horse's mouth, or at least, the Securities Industry and Financial Markets Association. Is the stock market open on Thanksgiving and Black Friday? What to know Thursday, November 27th? Ghost town. Nasdaq, New York Stock Exchange, bond market – all of 'em, shut down colder than a forgotten turkey in the fridge. Thanksgiving, bless its heart, actually managed to stop the money machine for a full damn day.

But wait, it gets better. Friday, November 28th – Black Friday, the day the rest of us are either battling crowds for discounted TVs or nursing a food coma – Wall Street decides to grace us with its presence for a few measly hours. The stock markets open, sure, but then they bail at 1 p.m. ET. One. P.M. The bond market, not to be outdone in its commitment to a leisurely afternoon, hangs around until 2 p.m. ET. Oh, the humanity! Imagine the immense sacrifice. These titans of industry, the ones who preach hustle and grind, can't even stomach a full workday when there's leftover pie to be eaten.

It's like watching a kid who's been forced to play outside for five minutes before running back in for more video games. "Look, I tried to work," they'll probably say, adjusting their designer suits. What exactly are they doing in those few hours anyway? Is it just enough time to check their portfolios, ensure their offshore accounts are still humming along, and then jet off to their Hamptons estates? Do these guys even need a break? Or is it just another excuse to pretend they're just like us, when offcourse, they're not? I mean, who else gets to clock out at 1 PM on one of the busiest shopping days of the year? My local barista ain't getting that luxury, I can tell you that much. They're probably still serving lattes to frantic shoppers, wondering when their own "early close" is coming.

The Illusion of "Business As Usual" and What It Really Means

After this grueling holiday "sacrifice," it's back to what they call "business as usual" on Wall Street. Until late December, that is, when Christmas rolls around and they get to do it all over again – another full closure on the 25th, and an early exit on Christmas Eve. It's not just a break. No, it's a strategic retreat, a carefully orchestrated pause designed to make us think they're human, while simultaneously enjoying perks the average worker can only dream of.

"Business as usual." What does that even mean in their world? For most of us, "business as usual" means showing up, doing the work, and maybe getting a half-day off if we're lucky. For them, it seems to mean having the option to hit the eject button whenever a holiday, or even the eve of a holiday, pops up. You can practically hear the collective sigh of relief as the clock ticks towards 1 p.m. on Black Friday. I can almost picture the desolate trading floor, a single forgotten coffee cup still steaming slightly, the screens glowing with dormant numbers, while outside, the real world is a blur of traffic and consumer panic. It makes you wonder if the entire system isn't just a giant, highly sophisticated game of 'tag, you're it' with our collective financial future. Then again, maybe I'm the crazy one here, expecting the financial overlords to actually, you know, oversee things constantly.

They just pack up their fancy briefcases and... well, who knows what they do. Probably go shopping online, just like the rest of us, but with way more zeroes in their bank accounts. This whole "early close" thing on days like Black Friday—it just feels like a wink and a nod to their own self-importance. Like, "We'll open to show we care, but we're not really going to miss out on our long weekend." It’s an unspoken rule, a privilege baked into the fabric of their existence. While you're trying to figure out what time does the stock market close today so you can check your meager investments, they're already halfway to their second mimosa.

The Market's Nap Time: Because Resting Is for the Rich